Friday, July 6, 2012

80's flashback

wrote this about a year ago..

Today I was walking through the hallway with a basket full of clothes, as I passed the open door to the bathroom Mackenzie said these words to me "Mom can you help me get some height in my hair?" Now on most days this would have been a simple request but today it triggered some sort of primal instinct in me that I had clearly been repressing since high school.
I dropped my laundry basket and pounced on the poor child like a lioness attacking it's prey. In the background I could hear a tribal call ring out,that looking back, I am guessing was my way of warning all other mother's around that this was my destiny and I had finally been called to it!!
Suddenly my arms were arching and curving around her head like I was preforming some sort of spell that included a fine toothed comb and a bottle of cheap hairspray.
I NOW know I may have mistook her whimpers and cries as shouts of "yes! That is Awesome! You are the best mom in the world!"
 I used my well developed skills to rat and spray like any self respecting 80's girl would do and I relished in the fact that next we would tight roll her pants and I would send her on her way in her acid washed jean jacket!
 As Def leopards faded out of my head and the cloud of hairspray receded...
 I stood in awe of my masterpiece.. she was at least 6 inches taller with perfect exact arches that started right above her ears and were at least an inch from her head... as the tears and sweat mixed and ran down my face I locked eyes with my offspring. I smiled widely as I moved to embrace her so we could share this soul connecting moment... but  she yelped like a kicked dog..
"What have you done to me?" One shove and I was back out into the hallway with the bathroom door slamming an inch from my face.. she was still yelling as I picked up my basket of laundry.. started humming "Pour some sugar on me".. and went on my way.

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